Word
is getting around about corporal punishment. The science is coming in.
That’s
a good thing, I’m not complaining. Check out these Time articles, brought to my
attention by Morgan - on Wordpress, she’s here:
and
here are the articles:
and
There
is starting to be a lot of this stuff, and it’s good stuff. The first article
states that something like 80% of families in a study that recorded their
family households were recorded using corporal punishment methods – perhaps a
surprise for those who haven’t raised kids yet, that so many resort to it – and
these were families that knew they were being recorded. This seems new to me,
mainstream press that states that corporal punishment is not going away.
The
second article pretty much lists all the extra risks that corporally punished
kids are in for throughout their life, as compared to less “spanked” people.
Again,
all good info, I’m not complaining.
OK,
I’m complaining.
This
looks good, I think we may be on the brink of the Hundredth Monkey effect here,
in terms of corporal punishment, it may be that professionals at least, and
maybe even parents are getting the idea that it’s not good for us after all.
But
all this talk about “corporal punishment” is misguided. It assumes there is
some other kind, which there isn’t. How can any punishment be enforced, if not
physically? We may wish to impose a non-corporal form of discipline, but it is
in the enforcement that it becomes physical; it is in the imposition of it
wherein the physical part lies. Be honest:
Why
would our kids accept our punishments if we weren’t willing to back it up? Why
would a person be “grounded” if they had no idea that there is anything to
enforce it? Again, be honest: what is a punishment if we don’t make it happen?
It all rests upon physical means ultimately.
So,
if we’re heading into Hundredth Monkey territory, if this idea is going to take
hold, let’s be honest about it, lets grab this opportunity and make sure a true
idea, a real-life idea is the one that takes hold, and that idea is this:
It
is punishment that is the cause of these poor outcomes. There is no harmless
variety, all punishment is ultimately corporal; we are corporal beings, after
all. What sorts of punishments would not be? Mental, psychological, emotional?
Do those who decry only corporal types of punishment advocate for the mental
variety? Are we to promote psychological punishment, emotional punishment?
This
is an all-or-nothing sort of thing.
The
question is not “HOW should I hurt my kid,” it is “SHOULD I hurt my kid,” and
the answer is, of course, “no.”
The
question is punishment or not. Make no mistake, do not be fooled my imitations,
the science is coming in, but it needs to take one more step. People are being
hurt by punishment, and the problem is THAT they are being hurt, not HOW they
are being hurt.
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